Forgiveness

Emma posted on FB: "Love gives us the means to forgive and heal our pains, embrace and joyfully celebrate our authentic selves and accept and trust in the divinity of our lives. However, it is our own free will that determines when this occurs for each of us.

Kimberly Kerns Safford Do you believe this applies to those who have wronged or pained us as well? i.e. True LOVE (not necessarily the romantic type) for another person allows us to forgive and heal the pains they have caused in us ... ? Does that question make sense?

Emma Completely makes sense. And, yes, my experience is that unconditional love does exactly that. It is love that allows us to heal and forgive every pain--whether we cause the pain or someone else does.

A wise teacher who lived about 2000 years ago showed us how to love everyone--even those who cause us the most pain. His example is one I strive each moment to emulate. See More

Joanie I'm learning that loving and forgiving someone doesn't always mean that it works to have them in my life. A big lesson for me!

Emma To me, that is part of what it means to be unconditionally loving.

Kimberly Kerns Safford Joanie, thank you! That is what brought that up for me. My ex cheated on me multiple times yet I forgave him and forgave him and just couldn't stop loving him and I was torn because I DO love him and I DID forgive him but why wasn't it all working properly ... That's exactly why, just because I do love him and I did forgive him it doesn't mean it works to have him in my life .... THANK YOU! Major AhHA for me!

Joanie It's a huge lesson isn't it? You're welcome : )

Wow... For some reason the word "Forgiveness" has really been in my face today. I snagged a little purple beanie baby bear from my mother with a silver heart on it's chest that says "70 X 7". The note on his hand, the scriptural reference from Matthew 18:21: ..."Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?" "No!" Jesus replied, "seventy times seven!" ... This little bear has been perched beside my computer monitor for 2 days now and I look at it often. I hadn't figured why I grabbed it from mothers, why it struck a cord with me. I have always prided myself on my ability to forgive those who I have deemed have 'wronged' me in some way. I am not a grudge holder mostly because I am simply too lazy for the effort a grudge takes. This said, however, there are those whom I have held grudges against with little to no intention of forgiveness. One of the people whom I hold a grudge against is dead and I still hate her. But I digress off of my original train of thought. Forgiveness. Why is this ringing in my ear so strongly right now? I have forgiven Will for all he did and put me through in our marriage and after it. This statement from my friend Emma got me thinking that because I have always loved Will it was easy to forgive him for all he did. But is that just blindness?

I don't really know where I'm going with this. That statement from Emma, and the follow up from Joanie really struck something in me. I forgave him because I love him. It actually makes me angry, THAT is the feeling I'm having right this moment, anger. It makes me angry that I loved him enough to forgive him, but he didn't love me enough to not hurt me in the first place.

Additionally, reading that quote makes me realize that I do not love MYSELF enough to forgive ME for all that I have done wrong in my life.