Dieting sucks

So, today I had to get up to take my 10 year old to get some oral surgery at 7am. 7am is an ungodly time of day that should not exist.  Because I had to get up that early, IN THE SNOW, I decided I deserved one of my favorites for breakfast: McDONALDS! I hate McD's most of the time, their regular food is disgusting but their breakfast ... mmMMmmm.  I decided against my typical bacon, egg & cheese mcgriddle because of the delicious, syrupy, pancakey goodness of the buns & just got the bacon, egg & cheese bagel.  I normally get the whole meal, w/ the yummy greasy goodness of the potatoes but today, I passed on my greasy taters to my Sweetheart (as if HE needs the greasy goodness...doh).  I did keep & quite enjoyed my large orange juice, though. 

I have not craved a Dr. Pepper today, at all.  It's probably because I've been distracted & really tired (again, 7am is an ungodly time of day!!).

I skipped lunch.  I actually forgot all about it until about 2:30 when my kids came home all clamoring how they were starving to death because Mrs. Obama has cut their portion sizes into a pittance. I decided if I want to get my calories & protein in for today I'd better eat.  So, I dipped into some carrots & peanut butter. 

I did manage to overcome a huge temptation today, yea me. We had pizza for dinner because 7am IS AN UNGODLY TIME OF DAY! I was being too lazy to cook.  While ordering it, I ordered a dessert pizza ... oh again, the greasy, yummy, cinnamony goodness of dessert pizza.  ERK! The guy said, "Would you like the cinnamon or the raspberry cream?"  Oh what a predicament my sugar addiction had put me into!!  My head was screaming CINNAMON! GET THE CINNAMON!!  I'll eat half the pizza MYSELF!! YUMMM!! But logic took over and ordered the raspberry because I hate it and won't eat it (my taste buds have standards).   That was truly triumphant for me.  The way I crave sugar is the way an addict craves crack. It is truly pathetic.  Regardless, I'm proud of me & not allowing myself to just give in and start over tomorrow. 

Dieting sucks.  But being fat is worse.  My 15 year old daughter came in today to tell me very excitedly that her BMI is only 22!!  WOOHOO!! Of course it is, she's a stinkin' cute skinny little thing! She seriously is darling & a long legged waif.  She's perfectly healthy & shapely and beautiful and I was so happy that she felt good about herself and where her body is instead of obsessing over her cute little poochy tummy that ALL GIRLS have! But inside my head I said sadly, "Mine's 44". A BMI of 44.  Do you know what that means?  Nearly HALF of me is nothing but fat.  My sweet kids keep telling me I'm not fat. I love their sweet little delusional minds.  262lbs and bmi of 44 is not even fat ... The word for it is OBESE.  So, dieting sucks ... but being fat sucks worse.